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Why Do Happy Men Cheat?

August 31, 2021

Although research on cheating trends has started to indicate that women cheat at the same rate as men, many sources still vehemently support the idea that men are more likely to cheat on their spouse or their partner than a woman. Because of this discrepancy, research has long sought to understand the differences between the sexes both socially and psychologically to identify why and when women will cheat vs. men.

Although there are varying theories, it is generally agreed upon that men and women do not have the same intentions when they choose to cheat on their partner. While a woman is typically more likely to cheat when they are feeling emotionally unfulfilled, a man is more likely to be opportunistic and capitalize on the opportunity to cheat when it easily (and secretly) presents itself. Psychologically, men are able to compartmentalize their emotions more easily than women, and are therefore able to separate their feelings for their partner from the guilt or shame of cheating on them. Because men are able to boil their cheating behaviours down to the belief that it’s “just sex”, it becomes easier for them to cheat, even though their female partner or spouse may be devastated by it.

For this reason, many men still cheat on their partners even though they report being happy in their relationship. You may assume that someone who is happy in their relationship, feeling safe, appreciated and loved by their partner, would be extremely unlikely to do anything to risk that union. Unfortunately, cheating for men is not about being unhappy; it is merely a convenient opportunity which they are able to compartmentalize and live with shame-free.

Other research suggests that men pounce on the opportunity to be with someone outside of their relationship in an attempt to re-imagine or reinvent their current reality. Even if they are satisfied or “happy” in their relationship, the thrill and opportunity to pretend to live outside of it, even for a brief moment, can be enough to pull them astray. This denotes a crisis in their own identity as opposed to a crisis within their relationship, and while a woman is more likely to have an affair when they are sensing a failing relationship, a man is more likely to have an affair when they feel this crisis within themselves.

An identity crisis coupled with an opportunity and the capability of compartmentalizing their guilt often leads a happy man to cheat on their partner. Because they are in a happy relationship and appear to be satisfied overall, it can be very disconcerting to have the suspicion that they are cheating. It may seem like a juxtaposition, but it is not uncommon. If you need help investigating your partner, consult a private investigator with a background in investigating infidelity cases. A happy, cheating man can leave more subtle signs that you don’t want to miss.

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